Little is more thrilling than starting a new relationship. The raising heart, the light chest, and the all around general high of finding a new love are all feelings we have each experienced. As the relationship grows and matures, thoughts of a future together begin to develop. This can then lead to the excitement of wedding planning, family planning, and house buying. But, those looking toward marriage, and all of the joys associated with it, need to also be sure to protect themselves financially with a prenuptial agreement.
But, when is the right time in a relationship to bring up the prenuptial agreement discussion? Is it ever too early, or too late in a relationship to have this conversation? And when the discussion does take place, what topics should the couple address?
Of course, broaching the prenup subject shouldnt take place on the first date, and probably not even within the first few months. Neither of you should be even thinking about marriage this early in a relationship. As the relationship progresses, however, and it becomes exclusive and more serious, it is important to have this conversation as early as possible.
In fact, most experts agree that a prenuptial discussion should take place before a couple ever gets engaged. In this way, the couple can be very clear with each other about where they each stand in their prenuptial beliefs. At this points difference in beliefs can be discussed and, hopefully, worked out before the couple decides to become engaged.
Having the prenuptial agreement discussion after becoming engaged is potentially far more awkward than having the discussion beforehand. After becoming engaged, having a prenuptial agreement almost seems more like an ultimatum of Now that we are engaged, you need to agree to this before we get married. Having the conversation before becoming engaged, however, is less threatening, as it is simply a discussion on your individual beliefs.
Furthermore, having the prenuptial agreement before becoming engaged can help determine whether or not is possible for the relationship to move in that direction. Discovering that you cant agree on having a prenuptial agreement after you have become engaged and announced it to the whole family and to all of your friends can be devastating.
For couples who are serious about their relationship and who feel it is ready to move to a higher level, this discussion should be one that takes places open and honestly. When it does take place, it is important for both parties to be candid about what they want and expect from a prenuptial agreement.
Obviously, a prenuptial agreement conversation is not going to be a romantic one. And, a full fledge discussion about who gets what and how doesnt need to take place at this stage of the relationship, though the subject should be touched upon. Despite its lack of romance, a discussion about prenuptial agreements is a necessity.
Prenuptial agreements are designed to protect both parties in a marriage. They help protect both current and future assets. And though the couple may feel their relationship is solid and will be everlasting, the cold, hard truth is that approximately 50% of marriages end in divorce. When this happens, all love is thrown out the window and it is a matter of every man for himself.
A man or woman who has worked hard to gain an education, develop a lucrative career, or build a successful business can lose it all simply because he or she was too blinded by love to have a conversation about having a prenuptial agreement. It is a risk not worth taking and two people who truly love each other will want to be sure that they are each protected later. |
